Monday, August 31, 2009
baybeats was awwweesome man.
lol
but the cleaning part is so not.
hahaha
Jamal Rad at 5:49 AM
Saturday, August 29, 2009
i miss facebook..
=(
Jamal Rad at 11:11 PM
Friday, August 28, 2009
sigh.
i have been banned from facebook.
but thats okay.
im too hot for facebook..
LOL
oh and thanks for the pillow uh.
i cant stop hugging it and fantasizing.
it has that.. fahmi and lutfi feeeeeeling.
hehehe
Jamal Rad at 2:57 AM
Thursday, August 27, 2009
dear God,
thanks for making today such a nice one.
never will i forget how you made my 17th birthday the best one in my life.
and i got the bestest best friends anyone can ever have.
i met up with bryan kamran fahmi lutfi burhan hisyam wenqiang galindo farhan and faris!
omg, even faris turned up.
haha.
they had a late dinner at bbq chicken,
and i got a cake
a present from lutfi and fahmi
and a birthday song from the rest of them!
dam i was so touched.
=')
and right now my sickness has been reduced to just a flu.
lets hope i get well for tmr.
Jamal Rad at 11:22 PM
for my 17th birthday,
i had flu and a fever,
causing headaches and a sore throat.
dear God,
i felt angry because you punished me,
and i cant seem to find a reason why.
dear God,
it may have been because i break fast outside,
when my mother actually didnt allow it.
it was mostly my fault,
but i know partly it wasn't.
i know my mother bought lots of stuff for yesterday's break fast at home,
but still i froze my heart and forget how much has been put in for me.
and i break fast at macdonalds, and had fun the whole night,
when i should go for night prayers.
dear God,
now i just finished bathing.
i thought of what will happen today,
and i tried not to cry,
because crying would just be a waste of effort.
dear God,
wanna know what i thought of?
before goin into the bathroom i saw the cake in the fridge.
i saw it.
seriously, its there.
and i imagined,
break fast today at home
all 5 of them there but 1,
me.
and i imagined,
my mother ready to cut the cake,
but the birthday boy isn't there.
and then they all kept quiet.
and imagined i was there.
and shared the cake.
dear God,
if i stayed at home to cut the cake,
i imagined,
my friends are waiting for me,
ready to surprise me,
and they kept on waiting,
but i didn't come.
they planned it all so hard,
but the person did not turn up.
dear God,
my cough now is getting worse,
i dont know what to do.
tell me what i should do.
dear God,
help me,
please.
Jamal Rad at 5:34 PM
for my 17th birthday,
i had flu and a fever,
causing headaches and a sore throat.
dear God,
i felt angry because you punished me,
and i cant seem to find a reason why.
dear God,
it may have been because i break fast outside,
when my mother actually didnt allow it.
it was mostly my fault,
but i know partly it wasn't.
i know my mother bought lots of stuff for yesterday's break fast at home,
but still i froze my heart and forget how much has been put in for me.
and i break fast at macdonalds,
and had fun the whole night,
when i should go for night prayers.
dear God,
now i just finished bathing.
i thought of what will happen today,
and i tried not to cry,
because crying would just be a waste of effort.
Jamal Rad at 5:27 PM
for my 17th birthday,
i had flu and a fever,
causing headaches and a sore throat.
dear God,
i felt angry because you punished me,
and i cant seem to find a reason why.
dear God,
it may have been because i break fast outside,
when my mother actually didnt allow it.
it was mostly my fault,
but i know partly it wasn't.
i know my mother bought lots of stuff for yesterday's break fast at home,
but still i froze my heart and forget how much has been put in for me.
and i break fast at macdonalds,
and had fun the whole night,
when i should go for night prayers.
Jamal Rad at 5:24 PM
for my 17th birthday,
i had flu and a fever,
causing headaches and a sore throat.
dear God,
i felt angry because you punished me.
and i cant seem to find a reason why.
Jamal Rad at 5:22 PM
for my 17th birthday,
i had flu and a fever,
causing headaches and a sore throat.
i want to go out laaaaa.
Jamal Rad at 3:44 PM
woohoo.
officially seventeen.
12 on the dot i was spammed by messages fb emails and calls.
wheee~
haha
and my first birthday wish was..
a sorethroat.
=(
Jamal Rad at 12:07 AM
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
just a few more minutes..
i cant wait.
theres like so many questions running in my mind.
what will it feel like to be 17?
what will i get for my 17th birthday?
how am i gonna celebrate my 17th birthday?
what part of my body will change for my 17th birthday?
what will i think will change for my 17th birthday?
am i 17 again?
will i be 17 forever?
how long will i be 17?
is being 17 gonna be fun?
must i grow up?
or can i grow down?
or roll down?
jump down?
fall down?
up down?
left right?
lol.
too many questions,
too little time.
im sooo exxxcited.
haha
Jamal Rad at 11:40 PM
yes ar.
happy 2nd aniversary to my blog!
lol
i'll still be faithful despite blogger hating me.
Jamal Rad at 11:36 PM
Sunday, August 23, 2009
or maybe its just that i think haven't done much as a friend.
Jamal Rad at 11:22 PM
somehow i hate this exam lifestyle,
this stay at home help yr parents lifestyle,
this rest while you fast at home lifestyle.
im trapped,
caged,
tortured,
hurt,
broke,
and really really sad,
for neglecting my friends,
my hygiene,
and my heart.
how i wish to be free,
and return to my flock.
Jamal Rad at 1:12 AM
Saturday, August 22, 2009
woohoo
happy bday to MY Demi Lovato.
im 2 days late lol
and happy fasting ppl.
dont go for night prayers.
it sucks, real bad.
i had to pray right on the doorstep of the toilet,
and, yeah.
you guys know what i have to settle,
face to face.
ugh
Jamal Rad at 1:30 AM
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
today is the start of study week and i had to go to school
because of my stupid ept circuit.
ugh
and i ended up studying at 201 mac
Jamal Rad at 12:03 AM
Monday, August 17, 2009
oh darn.
i need to change my mindset
Jamal Rad at 11:32 AM
Sunday, August 16, 2009
happy birthday farhan!
haha.
my best collegue.
and im not too late to wish you too.
speaking of birthdays,
i dont think im gonna have a happy seventeenth
Jamal Rad at 11:37 PM
Saturday, August 15, 2009
in the end i failed.
sey i couldnt come today.
i wish i could,
but i cant
Jamal Rad at 6:59 PM
Friday, August 14, 2009
well im starting to pick myself up from these bad times.
slowly i will
Jamal Rad at 11:05 PM
i feel guilty not comin to school today,
not handing up ept worth 60 marks,
and not going for tpsc sub comm camp for the september holidays.
and whats worse i'll have to think up of a long post so i don't feel as if someone was referring bad stuff about me.
hmm..
thats all i can think of i guess.
at least i'll try to update everyday
Jamal Rad at 10:08 AM
Thursday, August 13, 2009
oh come on..
no use breaking a broken heart
Jamal Rad at 10:50 PM
='(
blogger seems to hate me.
Jamal Rad at 9:42 AM
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
well 'Up' was quite a touching sad story,
but it cant match up to my level of sadness.
Jamal Rad at 11:10 PM
im in school now,
having a 4 hour break,
while slowly waiting for my heart to bleed to death
Jamal Rad at 10:50 AM
then again..
someone just made it worse
Jamal Rad at 7:30 AM
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
you know the holidays are comin up,
i dont wanna spend them alone..
=(
Jamal Rad at 10:32 PM
dam oh dam.
whhy oh why.
i suck at this..
and now i just feel like pulling my hair off
Jamal Rad at 9:50 PM
i should be happy wrtoral has come to an end.
but i still have no idea why i have so much sadness in me..
Jamal Rad at 6:46 PM
Monday, August 10, 2009
anyone knows how to cure a broken heart?
Jamal Rad at 12:37 AM
i have no idea why,
but im really very sad now.
pls dont ask why.
Jamal Rad at 12:34 AM
hmm.
this blog's dead i guess.
watvr.
at least i wont have much of unwanted readers anymore.
it always saddens me when i realise its too late to make a move..
oh well,
there other much better fish out in the sea..
=/
fishy fish,out in the sea.swim fast,and come to me..Jamal Rad at 12:20 AM